Below is the latest in a series of letters written between two contemporary poets who are openly critical of one another’s work – Professor Cesario de Torium and Professor Recamundus de Gelgadongo. Most recently, Prof. Cesario defended a poem which Prof. Recamundus claimed lacked any kind of meaningful subtext or artistic merit.
It has been two months since the last letter was sent, seemingly causing the conversation to stop abruptly, which Prof. Cesario has taken as a personal victory. Now, in light of an announcement of a clerical summit in the city of Becio, which for the first time will include several bards of the Saibhrean Isles, Prof. Recamundus has taken the opportunity to once again communicate with his rival, this time with a much different focus.
It has come to my attention that you will have also been invited to the summit in Becio. At least, that is my assumption, because it will not be the first time you have been in attendance and I understand you never miss an opportunity to go, in case you shall be showered with lavish gifts and praise for your work.
I have recently heard that for this year’s summit, not only will it be held in the “Floundery” (as I like to call it), in the North District as opposed to the much more elegant Stonecutter’s Lodge in the South District, the officials have even gone as far as to extend an olive branch to the bards of the Saibhrean Isles. If you have not heard this rumor yet, then I am sorry to say that I am the bearer of the bad news this time.
While you and I certainly do not get on famously, I believe that this news may even unite the most bitter of rivals. Believe me when I say that the work of drunken, womanizing storytellers of fantasy has no place in an official forum such as the Poetry Summit.
The bards use words like they use the daughters of gentry, and the depth of their meaning is only slightly less atrocious as their free verse. I hope that, despite our countless differences, you and I can come to some sort of agreement and stand united against this terrible agenda for this year’s summit. If we can use our combined influence to change the decision of the panel, then I suggest we do so.
Otherwise, we may be forced to keep everyone we know out of attendance. Please send a reply posthaste.Professor Recamundus de Gelgadongo